Darker: A Fanfiction
by ErinRMorgan
Summary: Christian Grey has been in eternal hell since Anastasia Steele left his apartment. After suffering nightmare after nightmare, misery every second of every minute of the day since she left, Christian decides he wants to get her back. No matter what. And no ex-sub, ex-lover or womanizer boss will stand in his way.
1. Summary

Christian Grey has been in eternal hell since Anastasia Steele left his apartment. After suffering nightmare after nightmare, misery every second of every minute of the day since she left, Christian decides he wants to get her back. No matter what. And no ex-sub, ex-lover or womanizer boss will stand in his way.


	2. Chapter 1

Three fucking days. It has been three, miserable days since Anastasia Rose Steele left me. These three days have been the worst days of my entire life. All I remember is her eyes, her piercing blue eyes that read into my soul.

That and her voice. Her words haunt me everything second, of every minute of the day.

I remember the pain in her voice; the pain I put there. I remember her red brimmed eyes as she stared at me with sadness and disgust. The woman that changed everything for me, and yet, as soon as she admitted she loved me, I pushed her away. The thought that an innocent, sweet girl like Ana could ever love a man like me, well, it couldn't be right. I couldn't; I can't let her feel pain because of me. _You did that already, Grey._

Fuck, I did. I screwed up royally.

I sit on my bed, facing the dark blue walls of my master bedroom, my hands holding the glider that I put together two days ago. I found myself, running my fingertips over every line and bump of the glider. I try to smile; I do but, the thought that the woman who turned out to mean everything to me, is gone because of me, kills me inside.

I've had Taylor watching over her every breath, her every step and her every word, documenting for me. Of course, Anastasia Steele isn't being Anastasia went she isn't stubborn. So, of course, she hasn't banked her check. Her account sits at a mere thousand dollars. Hardly what she deserves, she deserves all the finer luxuries in life. Ana deserves silks, satins and lace. I close my eyes tightly and gasp out a little, willing my tears to remain back. I don't succeed, and a few stray tears manage to slip past my barriers, barriers I had placed up a long time ago which were only brought down because of Anastasia.

"Argh!" I growl, fisting my free hand tightly before placing the glider to my side before standing and walking to my bathroom to shower.

Another miserable day of work, and it's obvious it hasn't just been miserable for me. My staff are constantly on their toes, making sure as to not piss me off with even the slightest problem.

Andrea had an interesting situation to handle later that morning when I first arrived to work looking as though I had been hit by a truck. Andrea had brought me my coffee, which for once, tasted like absolute shit before going through the day's work schedule. I noticed the glimpse of worry in Andrea's eyes, but I didn't care. I didn't want her pity; I wanted Ana.

The worst of the first day without my sweet Anastasia came during a meeting when I was rather bored, listening to other businessmen yapping on about some deal I was supposed to be settling. My lack of attention seemed to annoy Ross, not that I gave a shit. I only narrowed my eyes at her, and she would look away, knowing if she made one wrong move, her ass would be on the concrete outside. I wasn't one to be messed with these last three, miserable days.

It was during that meeting when Andrea walked in cautiously, not wanting to draw too much attention to herself. She failed anyway.

"Er, Mr Grey, sir.…you've been requested," Andrea whispered nervously in my ear, and part of me cringed from it. I only wanted Ana that close.

Sighing, I had stood, given my apologies before leaving the meeting room to head to my office, Taylor on my tail. Jesus, no one died man, give a guy some space. But I held that one back.

As I had entered my office with sadness, wishing Ana hadn't left me. Wondering if she even thought of me. Grey, you're a fucked up son of a bitch, she's probably already with the photographer. No. I couldn't ever think of Anastasia that way; she was never the type to change from one guy to another. Not my sweet Ana.

"Welch," I muttered in surprise of seeing him uninvited, in my office, "What's going on?"

"It's Leila Williams sir; she's making it hard to pinpoint her next move," Welch said, his eyes taking me in with worry.

I sighed with annoyance, "You disturbed my meeting for that?" I snapped at him, my eyes narrowing in on him.

"Well, sir, you did wish to be kept informed of everything…" Welch said hesitantly, as though I'd explode any second. He was right to be hesitant. I felt like I could any second.

After keeping my eyes narrowed in on him for a good few seconds, I turned and walked over to my desk, sitting down.

"Andrea, I'm not going back to the meeting, inform Ross to handle the situation, everyone but Taylor leave," I muttered, lifelessly.

After everyone but Taylor had left, I looked out my office window, "How was she?" I asked him, still staring out the window. I knew that if I turned to look at Taylor, my eyes would focus on Anastasia's chair. The one she sat in the first day I met her.

"She walked a mile to the bus stop, and got off a few meters from SIP half an hour later sir, she went in and hasn't left since," Taylor explained, his voice not showing any emotion but his professionalism.

I nodded and was silent for a few moments before speaking again, "I need you to do something for me, Taylor," I started, " Get me the number of the best florist in Seattle."

Five minutes later and I had the number of the best florist in Seattle seated on my desk, after dialing the number I heard a female's voice on the other end, "Welcome to Seattle Flowers. Janice here, how may I help you?"

"Yes, I'd like to order a bouquet of flowers for Miss Anastasia Steele at 85 Pike St," I mutter, hoping this conversation doesn't take forever and that Ana loves the flowers.

"Of course sir, what are your desired flowers?" Janice asks, her voice asking curiously.

"Uh…I don't know…" I mumbled awkwardly, feeling uncomfortable and shy suddenly. I hadn't thought of this part, and now I'm deeply regretting it.

"What meaning do you want to put across?" Janice suddenly asks, as though to make the situation less awkward.

"Pride," I muttered after thinking silently for a few moments, deciding that while I wanted to show her I wanted her back, with Ana, baby steps were best.

"Excellent sir, are you wanting a message and what time would you like them delivered?" Janice asked kindly, and after remembering what time Taylor said she got home the last two days, I gave her the time before explaining my message.

"I would also like to be informed when she's signed for them, the name I want to told is Jason Taylor," I explained, giving his work details before giving my card details and hanging up.

In just I've hours time, I'd know if my sweet Ana had received the flowers and if stood a second chance. I inwardly snorted at that; I would get her back. She was mine, and if I had any say in the matter, she always would be. I needed her, more than I ever needed anything. More than I needed the playroom, more than I needed air to breath. She was my air, my light, my sunshine… my talisman. Mine.

A buzz at my intercom informed me of Andrea's presence, answering it with a rather begrudging tone she said cautiously, "A Mrs. Lincoln has been attempting to reach you, Mr. Grey."

I closed my eyes tightly, for fucks sakes. I would have thought my complete silence was enough to make it visible to Elena that I didn't want to talk to her. She'd sent me at least thirty messages and attempted to call me fifteen times after my one phone call with her in which she found out Ana had left me.

"Tell her nothing, simply as I am unavailable, understand Andrea?" I snarled, not wanting to hear a word from Elena. She'd most likely only set my mood off completely. Only Ana could piss me off and calm me at the same time. She drove me crazy, crazy for her.

Exactly five hours later and I sat on my lounge room couch, my knee shaking uncontrollably as I felt my chest filled with anxiety at the thought that Anastasia would refuse the flowers. Please, baby, take me back. God, I need you.

Five minutes later and Taylor walks into the lounge room, even he seemed slightly relieved. That makes me feel a little better.

"Miss Steele has received and accepted her flowers sir, I had eyes on the door and received the notification via email of her signing." he explained.

I sighed in relief, sagging against the couch, giving him a small nod, Taylor turned away and left for his office.

I ran a hand over my face and sighed, god I miss her. I miss her giggles, her smile, her bright blue hauntingly beautiful eyes and her body. My body feels so tense and tired, my nightmares plague my dreams, and I'm left to miss her warm body next to mine as I sleep. I haven't slept close to five hours in the last three days. I feel like darkness surrounds me, and my light is a hundred miles away. In reality, she's so close yet so far away.

That night, following Mrs Jones' force feeding me, I lay awake, staring at my ceiling as I try to keep myself awake and away from the plaguing nightmares of my past. The memories come in flashbacks through my head, and I close my eyes tightly. Willing them to go away, willing Anastasia to be back with me, willing for her to say she loves me.

Because God dammit, I love her. And it took my selfish self, pushing her away to realize that. Truthfully, I knew it, I've known it for most of the time being with her-well the time that I did have her before she left me- ironically it was Elena who pointed it out to me, but I was never going to admit that out loud. Maybe I should have, perhaps if I hadn't pushed her away because she admitted to being in love with me, she'd still be here. You fucked up royally you piece of shit.

I felt my heart constrict with sadness, God I needed her. I needed my Ana. I lay there remembering the fact that Anastasia left her phone behind, so I'd listened to Jose's many voicemails begging her to call him back, fucking bastard. That and he wanted to ensure she was going to his gallery opening in two days time.

That's when it hit me; the determination. I needed Ana. More than anything. And that's what I'd start doing tomorrow; I'd start winning her back. No matter what.

The following morning when I awoke, I felt somewhat more refreshed. I had a mission in mind; get my girl back.

After showering and getting ready for the day, I sat at the kitchen counter eating my breakfast. Mrs Jones had been expecting me to glare at my food with absolute hatred, but instead, I only sat quietly and ate in peace.

When I was finished, I singled Taylor and proceeded to walk into GEH with more determination and excitement than I'd ever felt before.

Taking a deep breath, after Andrea's rundown of the day's meetings, I opened up a new email and began typing an email to Anastasia. But I couldn't find the words, so I put it to the side for the day. I spent my entire working day filled to the brim with anxiety, unsure of what to say.

Eventually, I sat in front of my laptop again, and I began typing out an email. As I did so, I realized she probably didn't know that I knew she got the flowers, so I thought it best to ask if she even got them.

From: Christian Grey

Subject: Tomorrow

Date: June 8, 2011, 14:05

To: Anastasia Steele

Dear Anastasia,

Forgive this intrusion at work. I hope that it's going well. Did you get my flowers?

I note that tomorrow is the gallery opening for your friend's show, and I'm sure you've not had time to purchase a car, and it's a long drive. I would be more than happy to take you—should you wish.

Let me known.

Christian Grey

CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc.

Now, I had to it uncomfortably and nervously as I waited for her reply.

Unfortunately, in the time I had to wait for her response, I had another meeting to attend to. The meeting was with a board in which I was planning to purchase their company; which of course they didn't like very much. But when someone who has way more money than you do tries to buy you out, they don't just try, they succeed, no matter how you feel about it.

"Look, Mr Grey, I don't understand what you'd find so interesting in the company." One of the many annoyed board members muttered.

"Mr Michaels, I don't purchase companies I'm simply interested in, if I believe them to be beneficial to my company than I consider them," I muttered back at him with a slight snarl. Don't question me in my own fucking building.

The man sighed, and even though he continued talking, my hearing turned right to my phone which buzzed with an email.

My heart skipped; Ana.

Opening up the email I smiled, it was most definitely Anastasia. And even though her email back is short and sharp, god it feels good to hear her again. Even if I'm not actually hearing her.

From: Anastasia Steele

Subject: Tomorrow

Date: June 8, 2011, 12:25

To: Christian Grey

Hi Christian

Thank you for the flowers; they are lovely.

Yes, I would appreciate a lift.

Thank you.

Anastasia Steele

Assistant to Jack Hyde, Editor, SIP

I felt my heart skipping around constantly with joy, and I didn't care that I had at least eight people staring at me as though I'd lost my head. And that included a very confused Ross but curious Ross.

I automatically began a reply to her; I shouldn't keep Ana waiting. If she's anything like me, she'd be dying for a response.

From: Christian Grey

Subject: Tomorrow

Date: June 8, 2011, 14:27

To: Anastasia Steele

Dear Anastasia

What time shall I pick you up?

Christian Grey

CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc.

I send the email and waiting impatiently for her response, and when it comes, I've reached a point of not listening to anyone around the table who gave up trying to get my attention about a minute ago, but I'm completely lost the more she responds back to me.

From: Anastasia Steele

Subject: Tomorrow

Date: June 8, 2011, 14:32

To: Christian Grey

Jose's show starts at 7:30. What time would you suggest?

Anastasia Steele

Assistant to Jack Hyde, Editor, SIP

From Christian Grey

Subject: Tomorrow

Date: June 8, 2011, 14:34

To: Anastasia Steele

Dear Anastasia

Portland is some distance away. I shall pick you up at 5:45.

I look forward to seeing you.

Christian Grey

CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc.

And God; do I look forward to seeing her; I'd go as far as say as I'm dying to see her.

From: Anastasia Steele

Subject: Tomorrow

Date: June 8, 2011, 14:38

To: Christian Grey

See you then.

Anastasia Steele

Assistant to Jack Hyde, Editor, SIP

I feel my insides warming; I'm seeing Ana tomorrow. My sweet, sweet Ana. I close my eyes briefly before I feel my body calming even more, so much so that I can concentrate.

Turning my attention to the board, I speak once again, "Let me put it this way, either I buy you under so you have no choice but to give the company over to me or, you do it professionally, and I don't have to waste money carelessly, choose wisely." I snap, feeling more determination sweep into me with excitement.

The board lean back and look at me in shock; I'd gone from quiet to controlling in a matter of seconds. Yep, get used to it. I love surprising people. It's somewhat I can be quite good at business wise.

"Fine." Mr Michaels says with annoyance, "Have the papers written by tomorrow, no later, or the deals off."

"Let me say this clearly once, Michaels," I snarl his last name, "I have a very respected name and face within this industry, giving me lip is only going to get you into an awkward position, and not just from my security…if you want to keep your thirty million dollars in your bank account then I suggest you keep your end of the bargain and don't question my authority in my building, got it?" I snap, and he blanches. Don't fuck with me. Everyone knows in this industry that I'm not to be fucked with.

He clears his throat, "Yes, understood." he mumbles while his face remains looking at the table while he fumbles with his fingers.

I nodded before looking around the table to the other businessmen who all looked pale, "The papers will be drawn tomorrow and sent out tomorrow at lunch, if they aren't returned in twenty-four hours, I'm buying you out." I grunted before standing and walking out of the meeting room and into my office, Taylor trailing me from behind. I could have sworn I'd seen a hint of a smile on the corner of Taylor's lips. Yeah, yeah, I'm back to being my normal, bright and cheery self. I inwardly roll my eyes.

As I sit down at my desk, I run a hand over my face before signaling for Taylor to come over, "Taylor, could you please ask Mrs. Jones to go into the playroom and burn all the whips and floggers, except…the brown one." I mutter, my cheeks heating up slightly. Remembering that Anastasia liked that one. Fuck, Grey, don't get horny now.

Taylor nods and walks out of the room to call Mrs Jones. I know that if I leave them in there, I'll never be able to walk in there ever again.

When he returns I ask him to inform Flynn that I'd like a meeting, to which Flynn replies that he'd be free within the hour.

So, half an hour later, Taylor drives us to the doctor's office before we walk in and I enter the office by myself, Taylor sitting outside.

"Christian." Flynn nods, gesturing to the couch to which I sit.

"Flynn," I mutter, running my hands uncomfortably over my suit legs.

"So? What did you call a meeting for Christian? Taylor tells me you've been…upset." Flynn frowns with worry.

Fucking hell, Taylor.

I sigh, "Anastasia left me." I muttered, my heart filling with pain again. Even if I'm seeing her tomorrow.

Flynn's eyes widened, "Oh," making it clear this wasn't what he was expecting, "How did that make you feel?"

I look at him blankly, "I'll answer a question, I don't regard as stupid." I mutter.

Flynn sighs, "Why did she leave?" he asks, his eyes looking at me with concern. Yes, I know I look like shit.

"Well, we were talking and the conversation went from fucking to arguing and she said she wanted to see how bad it could get— the punishment," I muttered before leaning over and squeezing my eyes shut, "I shouldn't have given in, but I did, but fuck, the look on her face when it was done, she was so pained, and I was the one to give her that pain," I said with an almost pleading voice.

Flynn looked at me with pity, "Normally that doesn't bother you. Generally you encourage them to leave."

I sigh and lean back against the couch, "I know, I know but…Ana was different, is different; I don't know how or what she did but, she changed me, she made me want…more."

Flynn gave me a small smile, "And she did it without even realizing it."

I nodded solemnly, "And…" I hesitated, "I had Mrs Jones, the housekeeper, burn all the floggers and whips." as I glanced at Flynn, I honestly believed he could have been pushed over with a feather. His mouth dropped open, and he stared at me in shock, "You did what?" he practically squeaked.

"I had them burned!" I snapped, standing up and starting to pace, "If it means I'll get her back, I'll do anything." I declared.

"Christ Christian! Anastasia has had more of an impact on you in a mere few weeks than I have in two whole years!"

I sigh and settle back on the couch, "That's great and all John but, she left me."

"Oh Christian, we both know she'll come back…"

"No, she won't John…she told me she loved me," I whispered, pained.

Flynn's eyes widen, "And?"

"I pushed her away," I whisper, my hatred for myself exploding.

Flynn sighed, "Christian your belief of self-hatred isn't going to go away in a few weeks, it takes time to believe and accept that someone loves you," He muttered, "But you will get there, you just have to aim for it and try and achieve it."

That night I sat at the kitchen counter and grazed at my food, feeling anxious and excited all at once. It wasn't a pleasant feeling.

"Mrs Jones," I called as she walked past, she halted in her step before walking back to the kitchen.

"Yes, Mr Grey?" She asked, her eyes wary. I would be too when it comes to being around me.

"You may be relieved of duties tomorrow night; I won't be in till late," I mutter, and I could have sworn to have seen a sparkle in her eyes.

"Of course Mr Grey, will we be expecting company the following night?" She asked, almost hopeful.

I shrugged, "I have no idea, I shall inform you either tomorrow night or the following morning, or I'll have Taylor inform you."

"Of course, sir." She nodded with a small, reassuring smile before walking back to her destination, leaving me in silence.

The following morning, I find myself waking feeling excited, I see my Ana today. Well—not my Ana but, she will be again. She has to. God just the thought of seeing her beautiful face, makes me smile. Not wanting to be in bed any longer without her being there, I jump and begin getting ready for the day.

When Taylor and I reach GEH, I'm a brighter mood, and Andrea is waiting with my coffee, so the three of us walk into my office and Andrea begins explaining the daily schedule.

I frown as she goes over it, "I'd like to talk with Welch before my first meeting, get him connected."

"Of course, sir." Andrea nods efficiently before leaving, a moment later my phone buzzes and I answer.

"Grey," I mutter.

"Mr Grey, I understand you wished to talk?" Welch says, his voice apprehensive, I suppose it has to do with yesterday.

"Anything new?" I ask this is growing exasperating.

Welch sighs, "No sir; it doesn't help that her husband isn't giving anything up but, I'm sure we'll get there, I'll let you know the second I have something new."

I nod to myself before hanging up and nod to Taylor who opens the door and signals for the first meeting to start. I sigh, this will be a long day.

Ten and a bit hours later and I'm leaving GEH, my chest is rising and falling rapidly at the thought of seeing Anastasia again. My Ana.

We pull up with ten minutes to spare, so I sit there impatiently before I finally see the front door to SIP open.

My breath hitches; Ana.

But as she walks out and Taylor gets out to open the door for her my eyes narrow. She looks like a fucking skeleton! She hasn't eaten! I feel anger swell up in my chest, not only has she barely eaten but there's a fucking man opening the door for her! Who the fuck is he?

Taylor nods at a skeletal looking Anastasia as she slides in next to me and while I want to feel happy seeing her, she's far too fucking thin.

I scowl at her and she seems shocked by it as she turns to look at me with those piercing, beautiful blue eyes and while that warms me on the inside, I remember why I'm angry in the first place.

"When did you last eat?" I snap as Taylor closes the door behind her.

"Hello, Christian. Yes, it's nice to see you, too."

I narrowed my eyes at her, "I don't want your smart mouth now. Answer me."

She goes silent for a moment before answering with a sigh, "Um… I had a yoghurt at lunchtime. Oh— and a banana."

My eyes grow acidly, I feel fucking furious, a banana and yoghurt will not keep her healthy! Fucking hell, Ana!

"When did you last have a real meal?" I asked, my voice radiating my anger.

Taylor climbs into the driver's seat and begins driving off into the traffic with ease. But as soon as he does, the fucking asshole who opened the door to SIP for her waves at her through my tinted windows. She gives a small wave back.

"Who's that?" I snap. Another fucking admirer.

"My boss." She peeks up at me and my mouth presses into a tightly painful line.

"Well? Your last meal?" I ask.

"Christian, that really is none of your concern." She murmurs, and I feel like my heart takes a hit.

"Whatever you do concerns me. Tell me."

Anastasia groans in frustration and rolls her eyes, I narrow mine. Anastasia lets out a little giggle, and I feel my insides warm up, causing my face to lighten up, and I feel a small smile appear on my lips.

"Well?" I asked, my voice softer as I stare at her with adoration.

"Pasta alla vongole, last Friday." She whispers and my eyes close with anger and pain.

"I see." I said dully, "You look like you've lost at least five pounds, possibly more since then. Please eat, Anastasia." I scold her; she can be such a stubborn child.

Anastasia stares down at her fingers; I've upset her. Shit, not a great way to start this off.

I turn to face her and ask, "How are you?" with a soft voice.

Anastasia visibly swallows, "If I told you I was fine, I'd be lying."

I inhale sharply; maybe she has been feeling the way I have. "Me, too," I murmur and reach over to clasp her hand, "I miss you," I add.

"Christian, I—"

"Ana, please. We need to talk." I plead, begging her to take me back.

"Christian I…please…I've cried so much," she whispers, and I feel my own tears welling up. So have I baby, so have I.

"Oh, baby, no." I sigh sadly, tugging her hand and pulling her into my lap. I wrap my arms around her and nuzzle my face into her hair, preventing her from leaving, "I've missed you so much, Anastasia." I breathe.

Ana rests her head against me and I feel like I'm in seventh heaven and I kiss her hair repeatedly.

We sit like this for a few minutes before Taylor pulls up and stops the car.

"Come—" I mutter, taking her off my lap, "We're here."

Before she can ask where I explain, "Helipad— on the top of this building." I glance towards the building.

Taylor walks to her side and opens her door and I notice the little smile he gives her.

"I should give you back your handkerchief," Anastasia says with a smile to Taylor.

"Keep it, Miss Steele, with my best wishes."

I walk around the other side of the car and grab Anastasia's hand whilst glancing at Taylor with a quizzical look; what the fuck man? But he returns the look with nothing in reply.

"Nine?" I say to him, my voice pointed. Fuck off.

"Yes, sir." he responds.

I nod and turn, leading Anastasia through the double doors of the building and into the grandiose foyer.

As we reach the elevator, I press the 'call' button. And as I stand there waiting for the doors to open, I can't help but smile. My Ana is back, and even if she hasn't officially taken me back, I'm with her and holding her hand. Can it get much better than this? Well yes, my dick could be in her but, one step at a time.

The doors finally open and I release her hand, ushering her in before I stand next to her and the doors shut.

As they do, I glance down at her, only to find her already looking at me. But as we stare at each other, a sudden electrical feeling paces between us.

"Oh my," Anastasia gasps and I too, inwardly groan.

"I feel it, too," I say, my eyes clouding and tensing up.

Suddenly I notice her teeth biting her bottom lip and it stirs something in my crotch. Fuck, that's hot.

I grab her hands and run my thumb over her knuckles, "please don't bite your lip, Anastasia." I whisper. She gazes up at me and releases her lip.

"You know what you do to me." I remind her, what she's always done to me.

Suddenly, the doors open and we're forced to focus on what's ahead of us. Anastasia seems to realize we're on a roof because she tightens her hold of her jackets the wind hits us, she looks cold. I wrap my arm around her and pull her into my side before I hurry us over the helipad to Charlie Tango as the motor blades swirl around already.

A tall, blond male who I suddenly forget the name of, stands wearing a black suit, leaps out of Charlie Tango and approaches us. He shakes hands with me before shouting above the loud noise of the wind passing through the blades.

"Ready to go, sir. She's all yours!"

"All checks done?" I shout back at him.

"Yes, sir."

"You'll collect her around eight thirty?"

"Yes, sir."

"Taylor's waiting for you out front."

"Thank you, Mr Grey. Safe flight to Portland, Ma'am." He says before saluting me.

I nod without releasing Ana and duck down, leading her up to Charlie Tango.

Once Inside I buckle her up firmly into the harness, ensuring the straps are tight. I suddenly get a imagine in my mind, and I give her a look with my own little secret smile.

"This should keep you in your place," I murmur, "I must say I like this harness on you. Don't touch anything."

I grin inwardly when Ana responds with her distinct blush and I run a finger down her cheek before handing her headphones.

I sit back in my seat and buckle myself in and begin running through the pre-flight checks. I eventually put on my headphones on and flip a switch causing the rotors to speed up.

I turn to face her, "Ready, baby?" I ask.

"Yes." She responds and I can't help but let an eat-shitting grin appear on my face. God, how I've missed her and her enthusiasm. I remember it as though it were yesterday the first time I flew with her.

I chuckle inwardly before turning to face the switches again before speaking, "Sea-Tac Tower, this is Charlie Tango Gold—Gold Echo Hotel cleared for takeoff to Portland via PDX. Please confirm, over."

After a moment of silence, the air traffic controller finally responds, efficiency, good. "Roger, tower, Charlie Tango set, over and out."

Just like that, I flick two switches, grasp the handle and Charlie Tango begins to raise slow and smooth.

"We've chased the dawn, Anastasia, now the dusk." I murmur through the headphone and I feel major satisfaction when Ana turns to look at me with a gaped expression causing me to smile and she smiles back at me. My heart swells with joy.

"As well as the evening sun, there's more to see this time," I say before pointing over to Escala, "Escala's over there, Boeing there, and you can see the Space Needle."

Ana cranes her neck towards where I'm pointing to, "I've never been." she says.

"I'll take you—we can eat there."

"Christian, we broke up," Anastasia says and I feel my smile and happiness disappear. As if I needed that reminder.

I look over to her with a glare, "I know. I can still take you there and feed you." I look away from her and focus on the sights.

Ana is quiet for a moment before speaking again, "It's very beautiful up here, thank you."

"Impressive, isn't it?"

"Impressive that you can do this," Ana says in reply and I feel my heart flutter.

"Flattery from you, Miss Steele? But I'm a man of any talents." I smirk to myself.

"I'm fully aware of that, Mr Grey." She says, making me turn to face her with my smirk.

Suddenly I remember the thing that also pissed me off earlier; Jack fucking Hyde.

I start off easy, "How's the new job?" I asked as casually as I possibly can when feeling angry.

"Good, thank you. Interesting."

Here goes nothing, "What's your boss like?" I asked, trying but also probably failing to see natural about it. Ana sees into me way too easily for me to even both trying to hide how I feel.

"Oh, he's okay."

Okay? Who says that their boss is just okay? I glance at her and notice a weird look on her face. I feel my gut clench. What the fuck has he done?

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Aside from the obvious, nothing."

I frown inwardly, "The obvious?"

"Oh, Christian, you really are very obtuse sometimes." Ana sighs.

"Obtuse? Me? I'm not sure I appreciate your tone, Miss Steele." I somewhat snap.

"Well, don't, then." She replies.

I feel my lips twitch, "I have missed your smart mouth, Anastasia." I say, feeling horny all over again. What I'd like to do with that mouth.

I hear a small gasp from her, as though she wishes to say something, but she says nothing.

I turn my attention back to flying Charlie Tango, I'm sure she'd rather not spend her second experience scared half to death because I wasn't paying much attention.

By the time I land Charlie Tango in Portland on a brown bricked building, it's completely dark. I slowly bring Charlie Tango down until we completely stop and I turn the rotors off.

I lean over Ana to unbuckle her harness, after unbuckling mine, "Good trip, Miss Steele?" I asked my eyes staring into hers.

"Yes, thank you, Mr. Grey." She replies.

"Well, let's go see the boy's photo's." I say before holding out a hand to her and as she takes it, we climb out of Charlie Tango.

As we do, Joe approaches us and I let go of Ana's hand —rather reluctantly, to shake his, "Joe." I said politely, "Keep her safe for Stephan. He'll be along around eight or nine."

"Will do, Mr. Grey. Ma'am." Joe says, nodding at me, "Your car's waiting downstairs, sir. Oh, and the elevator's out of order, you'll need to use the stairs."

"Thank you, Joe." I say.

I re-take Anastasia's hand and we head to the emergency staircase, "Good thing for you this is only three floors, in those heels." I mutter in disapproval.

"Don't you like the boots?" Ana asks and I find myself inwardly snorting. She's kidding me, right? She looks fucking hot in them, by now I've imagined at least six scenarios of fucking her with them on.

"I like them very much, Anastasia." I said, my gaze darkening as the thought re-enter my mind and though I go to say something else, I don't. "Come. We'll take it slow. I don't want you falling and breaking your neck." I say, cringing internally as imagines of her hurting herself come to mind.

The car is in complete silence as the driver takes us to the gallery, Ana is sitting quietly while I sit and think over and over about Jose and Jack fucking Hyde. All I can do is stare out the goddamn window.

"José is just a friend." Anastasia says suddenly, as though she can read my mind. I just stare at her though, as much as she may think he's just a friend, he wishes he wasn't. It's so fucking obvious. He wants what's mine.

I moved around in my seat slightly and frown, "Those beautiful eyes look too large in your face, Anastasia. Please tell me you'll eat." I practically plead.

"Yes, Christian, I'll eat." Ana says automatically but she sounds bored.

"I mean it."

"Do you, now?" She says, her tone filled with disdain.

I sigh inwardly, "I don't want to fight with you, Anastasia. I want you back, and I want you healthy." I say and I find myself holding my breath for her reaction.

"But nothin's changed." She mutters and I find myself imagining the burnt floggers and whips. Baby you have no idea what I'd do to get you back.

Before I can reply, I realize we've pulled up to the gallery, "Let's talk on the way back. We're here." I say before getting out of the car and feeling the cool Portland breeze hit me.

I walk around to Ana's side and open the door, but when she jumped out she swirls around to face me and shouts, "Why do you do that?"

I freeze, what?

"Do what?" I ask, completely taken aback by her random outburst.

"Say something like that then just stop?" she basically hisses at me, as though her answer was obvious.

I frown, "Anastasia, we're here. Where you want to be. Let's duo this and then talk. I don't particularly want a scene in the street." I say, and I would completely admit to scolding her right now. She knows how fucking private I am.

"Okay." she sulks after having realized I was right. Baby I'm usually fucking right, you just don't want to admit that.

Taking hold of Anastasia's hand, I lead her into the gallery. As we enter I take a look at the joint. It's not very posh, looks carelessly renovated but then again, it's José, they obviously didn't think he was THAT otherwise they'd completely renovated the place. I keep quiet about my thoughts on that one.

It's all brick and a few cheap chairs, I notice a few pieces of his work. Landscapes but the don't stick me as something that I'd ever put up in the apartment.

Suddenly a woman is greeting Ana and I, "Good evening and welcome to José Rodriguez's show." she says excitedly, sounds rather fake though. She glances at Ana briefly before basically staring me down before a blush forms on her cheeks making me inwardly snort. It's just a pretty face woman, and I already have a woman. My Ana.

She suddenly seems to recognize Ana, "Oh, it's you, Ana. We'll want your take on all this, too." She says grinning before handing Ana a brochure and directing her to a table with drinks and snacks on it. I cringe inwardly, it's so cheap.

When she walks off I frown at Ana, "You know her?" I ask but she shakes her head confused. Huh.

I shrug, "Would you like a drink?" I might as well see what their wine is like.

"I'll have a glass of white wine, thank you." she says and I frown, places like this always have shit white wine. But I don't say anything, I don't want to ruin Ana's night, so I head for the open bar.

I stand in line for what feels like ages, when in reality was probably only a few moments before I'm served.

The girl serving blinks at me a few times and blushes which makes me stifle an eye roll. For fucks sakes.

"What can I get you?" she asks.

"Two glasses of whatever white wine you have." I'd have asked for something more specific but it'd all be shit anyway so, there's no point to it.

Suddenly I feel the need to look up and as I do, I see Ana. Out eyes connect. As I stare at her, my crotch decides to wake up. Fantastic timing.

José is what takes us out of out trance by grabbing her attention making me glare at him acidly.

As José goes to leave, he hugs and kisses her on the cheek, looking directly at me while doing so. From the look in my eyes, he knew that doing that could lead him to ending up in the ground, so he quickly stopped. I could feel the anger welling up in my chest but I knew I couldn't take it out on Ana, so I took a deep breath and took the glasses over to her.

"Does it come up to scratch?" Ana suddenly asks and I look at her in questioning.

"The wine."

Oh. "No. Rarely does at these kinds of events. The boy's quite talented, isn't he?" I ask, trying ti change the subject and make it sound like I hadn't pictured killing him for kissing Ana on the cheek a moment ago.

"Why else do you think I asked him to take your portrait?" Ana asked, pride clear in her voice making me feel anger welling up once again. I don't want her feeling proud of a guy who tried forcing his tongue down her unwilling throat, I'd rather she be proud of me, and all my fucked-up-ness.

"Christian Grey?" The photographer from the Portland Printz walks up to me cautiously, "Can I have a picture, sir?"

"Sure." I mutter, hiding my annoyance. Ana attempts to step back but I grab her and pull her against my side. The photographer looks at us both and does a rather pathetic job of hiding his surprise.

"Mr. Grey, thank you." He says happily as he snaps a few photos, "Miss…?" he asks Ana.

"Ana Steele."

"Thank you, Miss Steele." The photographer says politely, especially when getting a look from me.

After he leaves Ana turns to me and says something unexpected, "I looked for pictures of you with dates on the internet. There aren't any. That's why Kate thought you were gay." She explains.

Ah, that explains that question. I remember feeling the anger swell up in my chest, having felt like they were trying to intrude on my personal life, especially give the nature of the paper.

My lips twitch into a smile as I think about Ana's panicked face at the time, "That explains your inappropriate question. No I don't do dates, Anastasia—only with you. But you know that." I say, my voice filled with sincerity.

Ana glances around nervously with her next question, "So you never took your" she glances around once more for her next question, "subs out?" she said quietly. A large feeling of happiness swells in my chest, she doesn't want anyone to know.

"Sometimes. Not on dates. Shopping, you know." I shrug, though my eyes don't leave hers.

She goes quiet and I frown on the inside, I have to rectify this situation.

"Just you, Anastasia." I whisper to her, willing her to understand she's the only one I've ever done all the romantic stuff for.

She blushes.

I turn back to face the portrait with satisfaction, "Your friend here seems more of a landscape man, not portraits. Let's look around." And she takes me outstretched hand.

As we walk past a few different canvases but as we walk around the corner, we stop, frozen.

What. The. Fuck?!

Standing in front of me, are seven huge portraits of Anastasia; pouting, smiling, laughing, scowling, serious and amused. I sure as hell aren't amused.

"Seems I'm not the only one." I snarl, my mouth setting into a hardline. "Excuse me," I say, and using my eyes to pin her down for a moment, I walk straight to the reception desk. I'm going to buy them.

As I get there, Miss very short hair and red fuck me lipstick asks if there's something she can do to help me. I can't help but notice the attempted enticement as she says it.

"I want to buy all of Anastasia's portraits, now."

Her eyes widen in shock and I notice the faint disappointment in her eyes.

Just as she goes to explain their cost, I cut her off, "I don't give a crap, I want them all and I want confirmation that Mr. Rodriguez will not be making anymore copies of those portraits of Anastasia!" I practically snarl.

"Mr. Grey sir, you're only buying the prints, not the negatives, you'd have to buy the negatives." She says softly, as if talking to an idiot.

I'm not a fucking idiot!

"Then I'll buy the negatives!" I snap at her, my eyes blazing.

"Y-yes, Mr. Grey." she almost whimpers under my stare, quickly taking my card from me and getting my details down. I breath a sigh of relief, one less thing to worry about.

I turn around to look at Anastasia when this is done and my eyes narrow, of fucks sake! Can't a man walk off before another fucker tries to weasel his way in?

I walk over to Anastasia who has a blond asshole surrounding her, and place my hand at her elbow possessively.

Making it clear I want the blonde asshole to back the fuck off.

"You're a lucky guy." The blonde says to me with a slight smirk, I can only look at his deadly.

"That I am." I mutter darkly and I pull Ana closer to me. Mine

"Did you buy one of these?" Ana asks me, she's kidding, right?

I snort, "One of these?" I say, not taking my eyes away from them.

"You bought more than one?" Ana asks and I try not to give her a 'are-you-serious?' Look.

I roll my eyes instead, "I bought them all, Anastasia. I don't want some stranger ogling you in the privacy of their home."

Anastasia laughs, "You'd rather it was you?"

I look at her shocked, my face scowling but I'ms secretly trying to hide a smile.

"Frankly, yes." Obviously.

"Pervert." she mouths and she bites her lower lip in an attempt not to smile.

My mouth drops open in surprise, I try not not to show my amusement and simply rub my chin in thought.

"Can't argue with that assessment, Anastasia." I shake my head and look at her softly.

"I'd discuss it further with you, but I've signed an NDA." Ana says and I sigh as I stare at her. My eyes darkening, "What I' like to do with your smart mouth."

Ana lets out a little gasp, "You're very rude."

I smirk, amused before frowning, "You look very relaxed in these photographs, Anastasia. I don't see you like that very often." I mumble, feeling sad. She's always so stubborn or angry, or even upset.

Ana flushes and looks down at her fingers, I tilt her head back and Ana inhales sharply.

"I want you that relaxed with me." I whisper, showing my vulnerability.

"You have to stop intimidating me if you want that." Ana snaps and I flinch on the inside.

"You have to learn to communicate and tell me how you feel." I snap back at her, my eyes blazing.

Ana takes a deep breath, "Christian, you wanted me as a submissive. That's where the problem lies. It's in the definition of a submissive—you e-mailed it to be once." Ana pauses, "I think the synonyms were, and I quote, 'compliant, pliant, amenable, passive, tractable, resigned, patient, docile, tame, subdued.' I wasn't supposed to look at you. Not talk to you unless you gave me permission to do so. What do you expect?" she hissed at me.

My frown deepened. She was right, of course. But then again, I had a very different type of relationship in mind when I sent her that, I can't help that things change between then and now.

"It's very confusing being with you. You don't want me to defy you, but then try like my 'smart mouth'. You want obedience, except when you don't, so you can punish me. I just don't know which way is up when I'm with you." Fuck. She's right. This is not going how I would have liked.

I narrow my eyes, "Good point well made, as usual, Miss Steele.:" My voice frigid, "Come, let's go eat."

"We've only been here half an hour."

"You've seen the photos; you've spoken to the boy."

"His name is José." Ana mutters.

"You've spoken to José— the man who, the last time I met him, was trying to push his tongue through your reluctant mouth while you were drunk and sick." I snarl.

"He's never hit me." Ana spits at me.

"That's a low blow, Anastasia," I whisper with such anger coming out of every pore of my being.

I feel like she's pushed me away. While I know it's true, I also know she should have safe-worded if she wasn't comfortable or didn't feel safe. But she didn't. I make a note to come back to that later.

I run my fingers through my hair, "I'm taking you for something to eat. You're fading away in front of me. Find the boy, say good-bye."

"Please, can we stay longer?"

"No. Go. Now. Say good-bye." I snap, feeling more anxiety and anger welling up in my chest. This really wasn't going as I would have liked.

Ana glares at me before turning away and looking the José. When she sees him she walks over and as they talk, José grabs Ana in a hug, before lifting her up and swirling her around. When he stops, she's facing me. I scowl, Fucker.

It's when Ana wraps her arms around his neck and I feel like I'm going to explode, my eyes narrow so deadly on her that I can see she's realized it was a bad idea to try and fuck with me.

I slowly make my way over to them and when I do, José turns to face me with a polite but I-don't like-you smile, "Oh, Mr Grey, Good evening."

"Mr Rodriguez, very impressive." I say, sounding still quite angry. "I'm sorry we can't stay any longer, but we need to head back to Seattle. Anastasia?" I ask, having deliberately stressed the word 'we' and I take her hand.

"Bye José. Congratulations, again." Ana says before leaning over and giving him a kiss on the cheek. Oh, she fucking went there.

Next thing I know, I have her dragged outside, I look up and down the street before sweeping her to the side of an alley way, pushing her up against the bricked wall. I grab her face and force her to look into my determined, angry and hungry eyes.

Ana gasps and I used that as my time to attack her lips with mine. Our teeth clash lightly and my tongue enters her mouth.

Holy fuck, have I missed this or what? God it's even better than I remember it to be.

Ana's hands are in my hair and she tugs, making me groan against her mouth. My hand moves down her body, and I grip her thigh, pulling it up onto my hips as my fingers dig into the flesh of her skin though her plum dress.

The last five miserable days of my life are being destroyed by this one goddamn, amazingly hot kiss. And the best bit? Ana is doing the same thing, she's kissing me like her life depends on it. God how I need her. Just as I begin losing air, I pull away gasping.

Ana is also gasping for air and I use that time to settle this, "You. Are. Mine." I snarl, emphasizing each goddamn word for her. You're a lit student, understand my fucking words.

"For the love go God, Ana." I say as I pull away and lean down with my hands resting on me knees. Holy fuck, Grey.

"I'm sorry." Ana whispers and feel anger still swelled up in my chest.

"You should be. I know what you were doing. Do you want the photographer, Anastasia? He obliviously has feelings for you."

Fuck, please say no baby, please say no.

Ana shakes her head, "No. He's just a friend."

"I have spent all my adult life trying to avoid any extreme emotion. Yet you … you bring out all these feelings in me that are completely alien It's very…" I pause, frowning, "Unsettling."

"I like control, Ana, and around you that just" — I wave my hand around as I try to find the right word before running it through my hair, "evaporates." I take a deep breath before grabbing her hand. "Come, we need to talk, and you need to eat."

 _ **Thank you all for your patience and enthusiasm. Yes, I'm well aware that this fanfic has been written many times, however, as someone who read virtually all of them, I was curious as to seeing what I could bring to the mix.**_

 _ **That and not to mention; I've read very few who have been completed.**_

 _ **I ask only a few things for myself to continue writing the fanfic.**_

 _ **1- I am a new university student (second week in), so please give me some patience and kindness. Don't get angry like a few did when the first chapter wasn't uploaded when they wished. Not only was I still writing it when I created the story on but, I was also struggling to get it uploaded once it was completed. I had to use the mobile app to get it published weirdly.**_

 _ **2- The only way this will continue is with people's support and good reviews. Yes, obviously I need constructive criticism, however, complaining that something's been done before when in 2017, there's no such thing as complete originality. Everything was done years ago; it's now up to me to put my touch to it. The more good reviews I get, the more likely I am to continue.**_


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